A Goal Without a Plan

Every goal can seem impossible without a plan to achieve them.

Every goal can seem impossible without a plan to achieve them.

“A goal without a plan, is just a wish.”Antione de Saint-Exupery

This is one of my favorite quotes of all time, and is very appropriate to providing good leadership to your employees. All over the Internet you will see articles, blogs, and other random comments debating the difference between a MANAGER and a LEADER.

What is the difference between management and leadership? -WSJ

After pouring through at least 100 opinions of other leadership experts, the underlying component they all have in common is “vision.” They all agree that an effective leader provides a long-term vision to his or her employees, whereas a manager simply provides oversight of day-to-day operations.

So if this is what separates a leader from a manager, the next logical question is, “What makes an effective leader?” Once again you’ll see an array of mass-fortunes that have been made writing books, leading seminars, and giving interviews, by individuals addressing the same topic.

In my own opinion, even though it is greatly underpaid compared to many other leadership bloggers, is rather simple: Leadership requires passion in what you do, a goal for the future, and a plan on how to achieve it. It doesn’t require catchphrases, motivational speeches, (or my favorite) group activities like “trust-falls.”

This equals leadership? Only if you plan on falling down a lot.

This equals leadership? Only if you plan on falling down a lot.

In order to be an effective leader, you must be willing to make challenging (but reachable) goals, and initiate a plan on how to achieve them. This is a big leadership fail in my current job. My boss is only a year or so from retirement and will sit down at most of our staff meetings and begin throwing out mindless and lofty goals with no strategies on how to achieve them. Knowing these goals were randomly pulled from the sky, no one takes her seriously, and we all wait for them to fade away, including her.

This is pointless. The only benefit I receive from these examples of “lazy leadership” is making great observations on what not to do. An effective leader creates a plan to achieve the goals of their long-term vision, and actively communicates the steps necessary to attain it.

Here are several tips I have found beneficial in creating a plan to achieve goals:

Create a Deadline: goals are only effective if you select a specific time frame in which to achieve them. By creating a deadline, you establish a sense of urgency not only for yourself, but your employees as well.

Break Large Goals into Smaller Components: If the goal you are creating for your employees is large, or long-term, make sure you break your goal into smaller, achievable steps along the way.

Communicate Progress Regularly: It is very important to have an open communication with employees about the progress you have made to your goal, and how much further you have to go. This will help keep everyone involved in achieving this goal focused, and informed on what still needs to be done.

Celebrate Small Successes: Even the smallest successes and achievements when perusing goals should be celebrated to keep employees motivated.

Allow Room for Adjustment: Even the best-planned goals can have unforeseen problems. It is definitely okay to adjust your goal as you go along to accommodate situations that are out of your control.

These are my tips for making successful plans to achieve goals, but I am always open to more input from my followers. Please feel free to comment below with any suggestions you may have on achieving goals.

Leadership is not nearly as complicated as others try to make it.

Leadership is not nearly as complicated as others try to make it.

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Four Decisions: Going Back to College

If at first you don't succeed. . .

If at first you don’t succeed. . .

Introduction:

This post is another contribution to my four part series I have titled The Four Decisions Theory. In a previous blog post, I have described how there are four major decisions in life that create the foundation of who and where we are. These choices play a critical role in not only where we are presently, but also the direction of our future paths.

By using hindsight to reflect upon these choices, it is easier to see what went right and what went wrong. It is very important for everyone to take time and reflect on their own major life events in order to recognize similar opportunities as they arise, or to avoid repeating the same mistakes.

Going to Washington State University:

All decisions in life have some sort of inherit risk to them. Risk and reward are often in direct correlation when it comes to life decisions, and this choice was the greatest gamble in my life. Luckily for me, it also produced my greatest reward.

Now many of you who know me are saying, “What about meeting your wonderful wife? Or what about the birth of your newborn child?” I know with certainty that I would never have met my wife, or be the father I am to my child, without the education and life experiences I gained by going back to college.

As I mentioned in my first life decision, Flunking out of College, my first attempt at higher education failed miserably. I wasn’t focused or mature enough to handle the responsibilities of my coursework, and soon became overly distracted by the social life of college. After taking two years off from school to work in construction, the service industry, and as a garden expert at a hardware store, I felt I was ready to go back to school.

Now I have never really been good at timing, and this decision to go back to college came merely two weeks before the first day of fall semester. Realizing that I needed a fresh start, I decided to apply to Washington State University, and prayed that they could process my application in time.

Even though I knew that I could enroll later in the winter, for some reason I felt a need to go immediately, and hoped that I would receive an acceptance letter. I checked online, called the admissions office, and paced in front of my mailbox daily. Each day I rode a rollercoaster of hope and disappointment until I was finally accepted three days before the semester started.

Washington State University is in Pullman, Washington, about a five-hour drive from where I lived. As soon as I got my letter I quit my job, moved out of the house I was renting with my best friend, loaded everything I owned into the back of my truck, and drove to WSU.

risk-and-reward

This five-hour drive was slightly nerve-wracking as I soon realized that I didn’t have a place to live, a course schedule, or even a job. I also had never been to Pullman other than to attend a WSU football game many years earlier. Even with the enormity of this gamble I was taking, I felt confident that I was going to be successful.

After arriving in Pullman, I was able to find a job, get a schedule, and a place to live in all in the same afternoon. Call it fate, coincidence, or divine intervention, but everything fell into place. From the onset of my first class, I found a passion I never had before in my studies, and I graduated with honors in three years. I even went further with my education than I planned, earning my master’s degree in education.

Life is about risk, and often we get too preoccupied with our failures to get back on the horse and try again. This was a major success in my life, and led me to being the man my wife fell in love with, and the caring and compassionate father I hope to become. It has also fueled my love of learning, and inspires me now in pursuit of my MBA. I wouldn’t even want to guess where I’d be had I not followed my heart and gone back to school.

Go Cougs!

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Four Decisions: Flunking Out of College

tumblr_lxpp5pFS1B1r2x4sdo1_500

As I have mentioned in my previous blog, I believe there are four major decisions in life that create the foundation of who and where we are. These choices play a critical role in not only where we are presently, but also the direction of our future paths.

By using hindsight to reflect upon these choices, it is easier to see what went right and what went wrong. It is very important for everyone to take time and reflect on their own major life events in order to recognize similar opportunities as they arise, or to avoid repeating the same mistakes.

A Strategy for Learning From Mistakes

The first of my four major life decisions is one that is very difficult to share. It involves one of my most critical letdowns in life, and I am still embarrassed from it: flunking out of college. Although this is dark cloud that I am sometimes reluctant to reflect upon, it does have some silver linings that has empowered me to become person I am now. The cliché of “you learn more from your mistakes than your success” is ringing through my ears as I write this:

Upon graduating high school I was pretty directionless when it came to long-term goals, and like most teenagers, I was hoping “to find myself.” I thought this would be best explored by going off to college, and after signing up for a truckload of student loans, I enrolled at Central Washington University hoping for a direction.

WhichWay

I had absolutely no idea what I wanted to do for a career, and I was hoping to randomly discover a passion from the variety of somewhat useless courses all freshmen must take. My parents (especially my father) were very controlling and strict with me, and I enjoyed this new opportunity to make my own decisions for once. The first decision I made: stop going to class.

What a wonderful idea! I soon found that my passions were hanging out with friends, staying up late doing moronic things, and being “too tired” to go to class each day. I forgot what my purpose was in being at college, and began to drift along through life. Soon an academic warning, led academic probation, which further led to an academic suspension.

I thought for a moment that the academic suspension would finally help me wake up. After getting one more chance from appealing the suspension, I fell into the same pattern once again, and was soon completely kicked out of college. I moved back home and rented a house with some friends and was very ashamed and embarrassed.

What did I learn?

I learned that in order to walk a path in life, you have to be passionate and interested in the direction it leads. I also learned that sometimes if the right choice doesn’t present itself at first, it’s okay to take some time and reflect upon your options before you force the issue. It’s okay to be different, to take the path less traveled, and find the direction that works best for you, no matter how unconventional it may be.

Looking back at this decision it provides great clarity when I face present and future major life decisions. I have recalled this moment several times when I feel like: “I must make a decision this very moment or the world will end as I know it.”

Learning From Mistakes

Like the old saying goes, “measure twice, cut once,” it is better to take an extra moment, examine what you want in life, pause to ponder the options, and make the best decision you can.

8 Ways to Turn Disappointment into Success

This decision, although poor in its present moment, has been invaluable to me since:

After taking a year off, working in construction and other various jobs, I was able to realize what I wanted to do in life. When I returned to college at Washington State University, I was more passionate about my education, and gave it my full effort. In three years I was able to graduate with honors, and followed my bachelor’s degree one year later with a master’s degree in education.

Did this lesson pay off? YES, big time! I am more resilient, stronger, and goal oriented. I now pursue all of my goals with a plan in mind, instead of wandering aimlessly and hoping for the answer to come along.

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Four Decisions Theory

What are the four most important decisions you've made in your life?

What are the four most important decisions you’ve made in your life?

In a previous blog about social cognition, I mentioned how my mother and I stumbled upon a homeless man in downtown San Francisco while sightseeing. This is a continuation of that story as after that moment, my mother and I had another interesting conversation that I like to call: “The Four Decisions Theory.”

When reflecting on what may have happened to this man that became homeless, I said, “Whatever happened to that guy, I bet it wasn’t just one thing, it was probably a few critical events or choices in life that led to him sleeping on that doorstep.”

It was at this time I invented my Four Decisions Theory. I feel that everyone’s present place in life can be quantified into four major decisions that were either made correctly or incorrectly.

Keep in mind that this theory is nowhere near scientific or proven, and is nothing more than a hypothesis of a man who may have had one too many Irish Coffees that night. But even still, the more I think about it and share it with others, the more it seems to gain strength and momentum.

My sample set is still embarrassingly small, but nevertheless I feel it is still worth sharing in order to build a conversation that you can have with your own self about the victories and defeats in designing the outcomes of your life.

Think back to the four most important decisions in your life. I’m sure yours had the same components as mine.
-significant risk and fear of the unknown
-hard to predict outcomes
-significant ripple effects in each option
-definitive change, no going back once your choice was made
-each choice led in opposite directions

How to Make a Difficult Decision Using Reason And Intuition

We can never be certain of where our next choice will take us.

We can never be certain of where our next choice will take us.

We are judged by our choices, especially when these options play critical roles in our long-term successes and failures. Everyone faces those moments when there is a fork in the road and a direction must be chosen. These four decisions shape our character, and made us who we are for better or for worse.

The Four Major Decisions that Changed My Life:
1. Flunking out at my first attempt at College
2. Staying away from my family for three years
3. Going to Washington State University
4. My Self-Improvement Plan of 2009

I’m sure you’re asking, why Four Decisions? Why not 3, 10, or even 100 for that matter? I guess four just sounded best at the moment, but it could definitely vary for each individual. My main goal is for you to explore the major decisions you have made thus far in your life, and reflect on what made them either a good or bad choice.

What four major decisions changed your life? I encourage you to keep following this blog as I explore all four of my major life decisions in more detail in future posts.

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Happy Thoughts

keep-calm-and-think-happy-thoughts-9

One goal I have always had with this blog is finding ways to create mental space throughout the day. Forget the mindfulness and leadership for a moment, and let’s focus on how we can keep you mentally fit, focused, and at your best even during the most stressful situations.

We all have those moments in which the fate of our day is teetering on a single moment. How we decide to handle this situation can either lead to a glass half full or half empty by the end of the night, and it’s critical you make the positive choice.

I have mentioned before in a previous blog, Stopping Negative Patterns, that just because you have a bad moment, you shouldn’t let it lead to a bad day, to a bad week etc, but how do you avoid the bad moment altogether?

CREATE SOME SPACE!

One of my ways to create some space and avoid these stressful and anxious situations throughout my day is to clear my mind and think about something happy in order to bring my focus back. Sound too much like the Disney movie Polyanna, or a Sound of Music song?

I use humor, others use show tunes, but bring yourself back to your best by creating space!

I use humor, others use show tunes, but bring yourself back to your best by creating space!

Yes I know it does sound a little cheesy, but by taking a deep breath and allowing your mind to reset around a happy thought or memory, you can regain your focus and energy and better equipped to conquer the tasks that are causing your stress and anxiety.

Positive Thoughts to Dwell On

When we get frustrated it can feel like we are ice-skating uphill, and it causes us to get mentally drained worrying about how to solve the main dilemma of the day. Tunnel vision sets in, and our thoughts get muddled and inefficient. This mental fog is debilitating and can completely throw off how you deal with tasks, or interact with others.

Think about the last few times you have lost your temper at work or at home. I can promise that your mind was stressing over some other matter, and the person you snapped at was simply in the wrong place at the wrong time.

Imagine if you only had a moment to reflect upon what was really causing your stress, put it on hold, and dealt with the situation in a healthy and positive way? I know in my own circumstances it would definitely save me time in apologizing for my reactionary behavior during these irritable times.

My many ways of creating happy thoughts to refocus and respond:

-Thinking about former vacations
-Funny lines from my favorite movies
-Memories with my family and friends
-Upbeat songs (be careful not to break down and dance)
-Or by realizing that whatever is bugging you, will be forgotten in an hour

12 Happy Thoughts for Troubled Times

It’s okay to smile, laugh, and be calm even during the most stressful times. Life is always as easy as you make it, and by creating space you will be better focused, more productive, and at your mental best.

Take a second, create some space with a happy thought and see how refreshed and energized you will become when attacking your problems.

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A Mindful Leadership Foe: Social Cognition

Are your thoughts and action stuck in a rut?

Are your thoughts and action stuck in a rut?

“What do you think his story is?” My mom asked as we wandered through San Francisco’s Union Square. We had been sightseeing through the city all day, and just finished having dinner, when we saw him. She was pointing to a homeless man sleeping in the doorway of a closed shop.

My response was, “I don’t know, but I bet it isn’t as simple as we hope it is.” My mom looked puzzled, so I continued to explain. “We like to believe it’s something they chose upon themselves. A reason that is easy and clear-cut, a definitive mistake that we can easily point out and blame them for: drugs, alcoholism, or people actually WANTING to be homeless. This allows us to judge them rather than empathize, and it allows us to ignore them with a clear conscience.”

(Pretty deep thought huh? I was even taken back by it myself.)

How Mindfulness Can Improve Self Knowledge

I continued: “Instead of addiction, laziness, or choice, it could be something more complicated. Maybe he has a mental illness and his mother who took care of him recently passed away. It could be possible that he started a business that wasn’t TOO BIG TO FAIL and he lost everything. The possibilities are definitely unique to each person and infinite if you really think about it.”

Since practicing mindfulness, I have seen life in more detail, and can put greater perspective into my thoughts. I have been better at avoiding what I like to call “in the rut thinking,” and I am better at seeing the ripple effect my thoughts have on my own moods, feelings, and choices. With an open mind it is easier to see new possibilities and solutions to chronic and habitual problems, and this was one of those “AH-HA moments.”
Instead of seeing this guy as a GROUP of nameless and faceless homeless people, I finally saw this man as an individual, a unique person, who I chose not to categorize.

When constantly faced with the same stimuli, our brains get desensitized to it. When we see the same things over and over again it is easy getting stuck in categorical thinking. The scientific name for this is social cognition, and it has been a useful skill throughout mankind’s evolution. Think of it is a file cabinet of previous thoughts, emotions, or other stereotypes that your brain stores for easy reference. This increases your cognitive efficiency because instead of having to rationalize and investigate each situation on a unique and individual level, your brain simply goes back to a former frame of reference and makes comparisons.

At certain times of our life, social cognition is very useful. It’s a “herding instinct” that can prove crucial in times of chaos. When others are running away from something, it’s best to join them. It’s also great at providing intuition, letting us know if a situation is dangerous or if a person is acting suspiciously. Social cognition can serve its purpose, but it can also be detrimental.

One of my favorite quotes in life is a great example of social cognition at its worst: “If you always DO what you always DID, you will always GET what you always GOT.” There are times in our life when we need to be able to see beyond the mental constraints our brain places upon us. Moments that call for a revolutionary change, or times where we have become so desensitized to the stimuli around us that our thoughts are locked into a mindless rut.

Your brain is a muscle, and like any muscle, it can be trained and improved. By using mindfulness meditation and clearing your thoughts on a regular basis, the world will show itself in a whole new perspective. You will begin to analyze your routines and actions, and snap out of these mentally dormant stages when social cognition takes over.

Give your brain a mindful workout!

Give your brain a mindful workout!


Great leaders and companies are proactive in overcoming these plagues of social cognition. They see constraints as only temporary obstacles, and work hard to create new strategies to solve problems that others see as the status quo. The cliché of “thinking outside of the box” comes to mind, but I hate that overused term with a passion!

I challenge you to look at your daily routines for you and your workplace, and try to analyze them with a clear and open mind. By examining the routines of not only yourself, but your workplace as well, you will see the inefficient routines and complacent thoughts that you have overlooked for quite a while.

Create space, and respond!

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“WWOJD?”

What Would Old Josh Do?

What Would Old Josh Do?

One benefit of mindfulness is that it allows you to be quite reflective on your life. Those past moments where you may have reacted poorly to a situation become more apparent with this clearer hindsight, and it helps you to avoid making the same mistakes.

With this clarity, it is quite clear that I have made only several thousand mistakes that I wish I could “redo.” When I look back at many of the mistakes I have made, I see several patterns:

-There were times in life where my impatience made the situation worse.
-I often leapt before I looked, and reacted instead of responded.
-I was stubborn when I should have been flexible and compromised.
-I was angry and jealous when kindness and compassion were needed.
-I would say things without thinking (over and over again)
-I was often reckless, and didn’t see how my actions would affect others

Mistakes are only bad if you don’t learn from them. Now with mindfulness I’m more present in these emotionally charged situations, and I am better at recalling past lessons that I learned the hard way. I like to ask myself, “What Would Old Josh Do?” and it helps me to regain my focus to find a positive solution.

The “Old-Josh” was before I began practicing mindfulness: the impatient, cynical, bitter, stubborn, and self-centered person that I have been slowly changing one meditation at a time. I was very impulsive and immature, and let my emotion drive my behaviors.

If I could only go back in time and teach him what I know now! It still frustrates me to think of all of the problems and stressors that I used to let get in the way of me being a happier and more productive person!

Now I am better at being positive, and I have found there is an upside to so many past mistakes, and I am bound and determined to learn from them. In order to not fall into the same emotional traps, you have to be better at seeing these situations before they occur. Mindfulness helps you maximize your focus in the present moment, and is very helpful in recognizing these patterns.

How to Stop Making the Same Mistakes

We all have those moments where we get frustrated with ourselves for making the same mistakes over and over again. That moment when you walk away and say to yourself, “Why did I just do that?” It could be that moment when your stress gets the best of you, and you yell at your spouse or child, when they were doing nothing wrong. It’s in these situations when we let our emotions trump our rational thoughts that we do the most damage to those around us.

10 Negative Thinking Patterns to Avoid

Mindfulness is great at helping you avoid your knee-jerk reactions and the negative patterns you create for yourself. Even now I’m nowhere close to being perfect, but I am improving in how I handle difficult situations. I still have moments where my initial reaction to a problem is wrong, but I’m better at correcting myself and finding a positive solution, instead of making things worse.

Even though I wish I had started practicing mindfulness long ago, I am thankful I’ve found it now, and I can use these skills to make less mistakes in the future.

Which mistakes are you constantly repeating in your life? Take a mindful moment and examine what you can do to break those patterns!

MISTAKE QUOTE

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